It's been quite a while already... and I'm very tired. I really am. I just don't want to think about so many things anymore. I don't like this kind of lifestyle. I don't like this kind of me. I just want to take a very long vacation, to worry about nothing, to enjoy, to relax, and most of all, to find myself back. The 2 day MC, was not long enough. I want a really long vacation. Can't anyone just push me down the steps? just injure me so badly that I can stay at home for a real long time? Perhaps it's better to just push me down the building, then I don't have to worry anymore. I'm not that crazy.. don't worry. I know that death does not solve problems, it creates more problems.
When I had thought that crying helps me a lot, but just for this stupid thing, it doesn't. This stupid problem just doesn't want to go away. And it just makes me cry even more. It's haunting me, when I'm alone, it'll force my tears to out. When I am sad, it'll make use of the opportunity to make me feel even more horrible. It's just so...
I hate myself and I hate you!
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